how forgiveness gives you more time and energy

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Forgiveness is Important for Your Health

Have you ever been scrolling through FB and THAT person pops up into your FB feed smiling while having the time of their life, and you can feel your frustration rising like the magma of a volcano?

That person used to be your close friend, or partner. But not anymore. You still have that event in the back of your mind of what happened between the two of you years ago, and it never got resolved. And now every time you see their face, you remember the time they hurt you.

Forgiveness has not been on your agenda in this case.

FOR YEARS I was carrying a Santa Claus sized bag of resentment (magically expandable and ever-growing). Each year the bag would grow bigger, and I would grow more tired under the weight of it. The bag was full of things like my parents opposing opinions, friends who let me down, anger towards myself for not doing better at life, people at work who said hurtful things, the times I put myself in poor situations and paid the price, and the list goes on. Anything really. Into the bag it would go. And the heavier it would become.

Collecting all of this toxicity started to show up in my health in negative ways through physical pain, sickness, addictions, depression, isolation, anxiety, and compulsive eating.

Withholding forgiveness is like drinking a little bit of poison every day expecting the other person to die.

This is why forgiveness is critical not only for having a healthy relationship with others, but also for our own personal health.

Forgiveness is Important for your Precious Time and Dreams

Relationships offer us a beautiful opportunity of connection, and they also come with the risk of being hurt. Any relationship is a package deal in this way. It is up to us to learn and practice walking through unexpected obstacles with compassion and forgiveness. When we do this gracefully, everybody wins! And something important to note is that there is no such thing as someone being unworthy of forgiveness. This can be a hard pill to swallow, but it’s true.

Needless painful exchanges happen every day and it can be heartbreaking, and especially challenging if we are in the middle of the situation. But it doesn’t need to be your burden to carry. I invite you to offer forgiveness.

For clarity’s sake, forgiveness does not mean what someone did or said is being made acceptable or even okay for that matter. We also do not need to surround ourselves intentionally by people who are going to cause us harm. The biggest takeaway I am hoping you will glean is that the importance of forgiveness is in the freedom it can restore to your life. It is a symbol of you letting go.

Let’s ensure that one event does not define you for the rest of your life. Because your life is worth living with passion! You deserve to glow. To be loved. To love. And to fully embrace your purpose. 

You have already been through enough. So why make things even harder on yourself by holding out on forgiveness. It doesn’t make what someone else did right. It’s for the healing of your soul. Not for them. I would love to share a powerful affirmation my mentor Mary Morrissey taught me that you can post on your mirror or write on a note in your phone:

“I make a commitment to experience the freedom of forgiveness. When I notice that I am holding people, conditions, and circumstances hostage in my own mind, I am willing to change my thoughts, in that moment, and release myself and all others to the benefit of a greater good.”

I invite you to allow yourself to breathe in the freedom and peace of mind you can experience when you are freed by forgiveness and you get to move on to bigger and better things in your life! And let’s also remember that we are all spiritual beings having a human experience. We are all doing the best we can at the moment. Every action on the planet is an action of love, or a call for love, no matter how unskillful it appears.

In my coaching, I teach my clients how to separate the being from the behavior. This powerful tool allows a way for forgiveness to be present despite a deeply painful experience.

If you do feel stuck and you are not feeling able to have forgiveness concerning a specific person or an event in your life, I want you to know there are ways to create more peace surrounding that situation. There are some types of hurt that take more time and work than others. And again, let’s bring you the freedom you deserve!

Get Rid of the Energy Drain

I have found through experience that forgiveness is important because we only have so much energy in a day to give, and if we are using most of our energy to carry the mental equivalent to a 50 LB bag of resentment (that magical Santa Claus bag), everything else in our life is going to suffer. And on the flip-side, think about putting down that 50 LB bag of resentment by forgiving the people that have hurt you throughout your life. Imagine taking this action in your mind. Can you almost feel the relief of letting that go? And now, you get to walk away from that heavy burden. Think about the energy you are getting back! Forgiveness is your freedom.

With a lighter burden to carry, the dreams that you have held in your heart for years will now get the love and attention they deserve.

Now you can put more energy into building a life you love living!

The importance of forgiveness is a BIG topic to cover and there is a lot more to it than I could share in a simple message to you. I hope you can give me grace in that way because I know forgiveness can be a painful area. I go more in depth with my coaching, and this is a great place to start. I am sending you healing and compassion as you navigate through the tender parts of your heart.

Your Lifework:

I invite you to take time to journal about an event in your life that had appeared negative at the time, but later your found out it turned out to be the best possible outcome because you got to see the bigger picture. Take time to write about all of the positive outcomes that led from that “negative” experience.

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